"More Movie Reviews"

     I went to see "Before Midnight" yesterday.  It was right up there with my least favorite movies of all time.

     I hate, absolutely hate, a movie that is nothing but talking, talking, and more talking.  That describes this particular movie in a nutshell.  There was zero action, a miniscule fragment of scenery, and the two lead characters engaged in a conversation that I though would never end.  In a way it reminded me of "The Descendants", a film in which the characters walked and talked for two interminably long hours.  To that movie's credit however, was the beautiful scenery (and I don't mean Clooney!).  Michael Clayton was another movie of the same vein.  Ceaseless talking.  My ears were bleeding and begging for mercy by the time I left each of these films.  After seeing movies of this caliber, it is a pleasure having no one home waiting for me besides Buddy.  I love it that he can't talk...

     Here is a sampling of the worst movies I have ever seen:

Carnal Knowledge 

Barbarella

The English Patient

The Blair Witch Project

To the Wonder

Before Midnight

     I was only sixteen when Carnal Knowledge was released.  After more than forty years, it still stands out as THE worst movie I have ever seen.  It is the only movie that I have ever walked out on.

     Barbarella was another loser.  The only good thing about seeing it, was that I was eighteen years old, and at the Drive-In with my adorable boyfriend Bruce...

     I was deeply disappointed in The English Patient.  I hated it.  When it came out on video, I actually rented it, because I couldn't believe that I hated it so much.  I did.  My children have never let me live that down, either.  Each time I declare my distaste for a movie, they ask me if I plan to rent it so I can be sure...

     The Blair Witch Project was not my movie of choice.  I merely went to appease the spouse.  It was awful.  Both of us emerged with splitting headaches from the constant motion of the film, from the camera man constantly running.

     I gave my review of To the Wonder after I saw it, about six weeks ago.  To its credit, it had eye candy, i.e., Ben Affleck.  That's about the only good thing I can say about it.

     I harbored nothing but disdain for the characters in Before Midnight.  They were crude and annoying, and the film definitely showed more of her than I wanted to see. Actresses of a certain age should keep their blouses on...